… that it’s a good thing I’ve got an appointment with my counselor this evening, because I’m on the verge of a major anxiety/panic attack.

Here it is, less than 48 hours from when I’m supposed to close on my condo, and I STILL don’t have the final word that my loan is in place … or that it isn’t … my loan denial deadline was this past Friday, so if it doesn’t come through, then I’m out my $1,000.00 earnest money AND the money that I paid for the inspector … and my mortgage broker won’t call me back, which to me isn’t a very good sign, even though the word I’ve been getting from him is that “it’s just a formality”; “the loan program hasn’t changed, even with all the turmoil”; etc., etc.

This is just too much … and it’s not the way to do business … if I were getting this close to the end of a deal (even if it’s a relatively small one like mine), if there were delays, I’d get on the phone and call my client, if only to say that “hey, there’s another delay”, and not just keep the client hanging out on a limb, not knowing what’s going on.

I’m really beginning to think the loan isn’t going to happen … and that I’ll have to start looking for an apartment to rent, rather than planning a move into something that the bank and I both own … and I’m REALLY not looking forward to that prospect. Renting sucks.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckity fuck fuck! Once again (and louder):

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKITY FUCK FUCK!